Ariela’s Friends and Mine

By March 16, 2015Loss

Ariela’s friends come to see me. I like to think they are my friends, too. But first they were friends with Ariela. They started as her aides, hired for the job. But it was never just a job, and they knew that from the start. In the past week, four of her friends came by, and two sent me emails.

I went to dinner with Kim. We came back to my house and my closet. Kim is my fashionista buddy and was Ariela’s before she was mine. She went through my sweaters and told me I needed to get a few new things for my trip to New York.

“These are fall colors. You need spring,” she said. “We’ll go shopping.”

That’s good, because I hate shopping by myself. I see a top or a dress and think, “Oh, that would look so cute on Ariela.” Then, I remember.

I used to love buying clothes for Ariela, though she rarely liked what I selected. She loved shopping for herself. I was never sure if she didn’t like my taste, or she just wanted to have some control over her life, or maybe she wanted to tell me she could buy her clothes without me.

I think clothes are all about communication. Ariela liked to make a statement with her outfits. So, it figures that she would want to pick out her own wardrobe. She went in for plaids and stripes and bright colors. I suspect she would have been more flamboyant in her dress if she could have found more things to fit. She wore a size 7 girls. It’s not easy to find trendy clothes in that size. I had a few things tailored for her. But most of the time, shopped in the children’s department and avoided anything that said, “juvenile.” She shopped with friends, like Kim, who knew what was cool and would buy things they liked. She liked Abercrombie’s and Forever 21 and the GAP.

So, now I shop with Kim, because she knows what’s in fashion. And like all of Ariela’s friends, she connects me with all things young, and hip, and springtime, and Ariela.

  • Thank goodness for that saleswoman. And for all the like-minded salespeople at Victoria Secret, and Sephora, and Forever 21, and ….

  • Sue says:

    Clothes are a big topic in my home. My daughter has shopped for herself for years and there is hell to pay if I try to get her to buy something she doesn’t want. We once had a colossal fight in a lingerie store when I thought she was too young for a black bra. She wouldn’t put it back on the shelf and a saleswoman came bustling over to see what the matter was–I’m sure she thought I was harming the ‘poor little disabled’ girl. The saleswoman assured me that “all the 15 year olds” are wearing black bras and that my daughter was spot on in her bra choice. My daughter gave me her “I told you so” grin and we bought the bra. When we got home my husband thought the bra was mine and was shocked to learn it wasn’t. Since then this is the only lingerie store my daughter shops in. And my daughter has very expensive (and young, cool) bras.

  • If you’re going to get really upset about something, it should clothes. That’s Ariela — a true fashionista. Good that you made it right.

  • Nicole Muller says:

    She definitely had an opinion with her clothes as with everything. I remember the day that I accidentally left a store that had a shirt she wanted. She made it very clear that I had messed up. We went back all all was right.

  • Elizabeth says:

    I enjoy reading your blogs very much because they are real. Clearly this one would touch me in a very special way because of Kim. You and your family have always had a special place in her heart and in her life. And she is a very special beautiful person inside out! I have learn so much from her and wish I could be more like her 🙂

    • Thank you. Kim has a special light that never fails to brighten our home. She had a special relationship with Ariela and now with me. She could always make Ariela smile even through some dark times. That’s a gift.

  • Lillian says:

    A lovely piece, Harriet.

  • Liz says:

    Ariela makes me want to go out and buy something fashionable and less predictable. You really appreciated her spirit!

  • I suppose I was the same with my mother — until I got much older.

  • Rosy Villalobos says:

    Great connections..
    Shopping with you it’s fun! Kim must have had a great time….And my daughter it’s like yours, she never likes what I like in the store…

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